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Heidi Montag Returns From Mexico

The miserable attempt at a singing career, the mooching off of charity events for her own self-promotion, the obviously fake firing on The Hills… Hasn't Heidi had enough humiliation lately? Now the faux reality show blonde has returned from Cabo after eloping with her creepy beau Spencer, whom she calls a "genius businessman." Sorry Heidi, but if your man really was a genius, he would have kept you south of the border where you could at least score gigs doing infomercials for plastic surgery. Now the pair is back in the States doing what they do best—stirring up our gag reflexes one US Weekly photo at a time.