18 May 2009
12:35 p.m.
Thanks to Naomi, Bloke and I were forced to have a conversation that we were so not ready to have. After she shuffled away, Bloke kinda sighed and asked me again if I had a boyfriend. I said no.
So he said, "Say you were to come back to my hotel and stay with me all weekend, would you need to call to check in with someone lest he alert the nearest precinct to your disappearance?"
And I was all: "grumblemumblegrumble,"
and he was all: "I can't hear you,"
and I was all, (sigh) "yes."
So
then I had to totally dime myself out about why I'd been ambivalent (ahem semi-deceptive)
about having a bf. I said it was half about me cooling on Fixr-upper in
general, and half about me wanting to leave the door open to see if
there were still sparks between me and Bloke.
I just about crawled under the table from embarrassment. I mean I don't
exactly live for the "where is this going?" speech—and this one was
way way premature.
"Anyway," I said, "I guess it's pretty f'n complicated... sorry."
And then he was all "I have a suggestion, and uh, you know, I'm just going to say it and uh, you can do with it as you will... "End it. Be my girlfriend for the summer. How uncomplicated is that?"
And I was like "pretty uncomplicated." Needless to say I did spend the entire weekend in his hotel. It was beyond dreamy. I'm so happy—I can not even tell you. Happy mixed with a nice dose of dread. Dread over having to break up with Mr. Fixer, who there is frankly nothing wrong with, and who (let's be honest) did everything right. I managed to get through the weekend by just putting him off. He's not stupid, I'm sure he knows something is up. But I think he's afraid of what it is so he isn't pushing.
Shudder.
Seriously, having to break up with someone is the absolute worst.
