Can You Creatively Pick Up My Dry Cleaning? Mmmmmmm. Thanks So Much!
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05 Mar 2008 ›
6:45pm
Well so far, I’ve met with five girls vying for the Claire assistant job. It’s hard to shake out a distinguishing feature from the bunch. All seem smart, educated, and in complete denial about the opportunities that this position will offer. If I had a dollar for every time one of them said she was a “creative person” looking for a “creative job,” I’d have enough to get a weekly Pedi at Rescue. I desperately want to tell them each that the most creative thing they’ll be doing for the next year is finding new, inventive ways to talk themselves into getting out of bed each morning. But really—what would be the use? It’s unavoidable—jobs like this are the gatekeepers of the corporate world. Gotta do the time baby girls, ‘aint no way round. Besides, the candidates came through HR and probably had the life sucked out of them in the process. It will take months on the job for a real personality to begin leaking out the cracks. But just as I was thinking I may have to do a straight up eeny-meeny-miny-moe, something cool happened. As one interviewee was heading toward the elevators to leave, Naomi blazed by in the other direction (in full Naomi splendor). The girl (let’s just call her Alice), thinking she was alone in the hallway, did a cartoony double take—and as her head turned to follow Naomi’s retreating lycra-draped badonkadonk, her face lit up with hysterical glee. But as her eyes continued to travel down the hall they met my own. Her face lost a bit of color when she saw me, realizing I’d caught her in an unguarded moment. We held each other’s gaze for a second, and despite my best attempt at a poker face I’m sure my eyes betrayed my true feelings (um… try complete understanding). She (in what I chose to interpret as sign of maturity) quickly bowed out of our little staring contest, and disappeared into the elevator banks.
Yessiree. I do believe we’ve got a contender.